Wednesday, March 10, 2010

How We Met

In August of 1996 I moved to Jackson, Mississippi, to attend Millsaps College. In August of 1997, my now-husband Adam moved to Jackson from Monroe, Louisiana, for the same reason. Jackson is pretty small-town after growing up in D/FW. Millsaps was great and I had no problem with Jackson while I was in school, but I definitey had absolutely no intention of staying there after I graduated. However, as He so often does, God had other plans. Millsaps is a small college (less than 1500 undegrads), so Adam and I knew each other, had a lot of mutual friends, and maybe even chatted occasionally, but there were a few key moments that really mark the beginning of our story:

1) On move-in day at the beginning of my senior year (Adam's junior year), we were parked near each other in the parking lot unloading our cars at the same time (we lived on different floors of the same dorm). After dozens of trips back and forth up two flights of stairs, I was literally taking the last load of stuff out of my car, and it was then that Adam swooped in and asked if I needed any help…great timing, huh? Anyway, we talked briefly, then he apparently went back to his dorm and told his roommate that he intended to go out with me. He then proceeded to start dating a good friend of mine (we’ll call her "N"). Not that it bothered me – I thought he was nice and cute, but he wasn’t on my radar as date material at the time.

2) I was not in a sorority, but my roommate and most of my close friends were, so I was invited to attend one of their date parties. My roommate had a "pre-party" in our dorm room, so I was there with my date (we’ll call him "B"), and Adam was there with N. At one point Adam and I ended up sitting on the couch next to each other and, somehow, even though the setting was not AT ALL conducive to this type of discussion, we started talking about church and discovered that we had both been brought up in the Baptist church. Millsaps is a Methodist-affiliated school and, quite frankly, Baptists were few and far between, so we both felt like it was something of a coincidence. The conversation didn’t last long, and then we were both back to our dates. I ended up seeing B for several months after that. Adam and N stopped seeing each other not too long after the party (for unrelated reasons, my friendship with her later ran its course, lest anyone worry that I broke some cardinal rule of friendship by dating and later marrying Adam!).

Fast forward to March: 3) Over Spring Break, B and I broke up. I was sad at first, but the sadness was quickly overshadowed by a feeling of relief as I realized that I was 100% free to do whatever I wanted, wherever I wanted, with no ties to anyone or anything anywhere! Since B was from Mississippi, there had been some question about what I would do after graduation – stay in Mississippi? Try a long-distance relationship? Well, our break-up took care of that problem quite handily! So I planned to move back home and look into the buyer’s training program at Macy’s or Saks. One night during the first week back to school after Spring Break I went to the cafeteria for dinner, where I bumped into Adam. And that’s when it happened – he told me I looked pregnant (yeah, he's smooth like that). Just what every girl (who isn’t pregnant) wants to hear, right? :) By way of explanation, I should tell you that I had just been to the gym, so I was tired and walked up to him rather dramatically with my hands pressed into my lower back. In Adam’s mind this apparently conjured images of the pregnant waddle and the words left his mouth before his better judgment could stop him. I laughed, then walked away, pretending to be hurt and appalled. He tells me that his friends gave him a lot of grief about the comment, and he sent me an e-mail later to explain and apologize. We started e-mailing and talking more and more after that. Several nights we sat up in the lobby of our dorm and just talked for hours and hours. From the beginning I told him we should keep things casual and just enjoy getting to know one another. I was graduating in a month and moving back to Texas; he still had a year to go. This was just not the right time to be getting into anything serious!

4) Easter rolled around and Adam invited me to spend the weekend with him and his family in Monroe. As soon as I met his parents and his brothers, I knew my "keep things casual" plan was in trouble. They were, and are, AWESOME. They just folded me right in to the mix. I felt and saw a level of love and friendship and care that was really familiar to me…it reminded me of my own family.

5) Needless to say, my "plan" disintegrated. On graduation day, before I drove back to Texas with my car loaded down with all of my stuff, Adam and I sat on a bench at a park and had "the talk" – you know, the DTR (Defining The Relationship). We decided to give it a shot and do the long-distance thing. That lasted for about, oh, three months, maybe four. I spent the summer in Fort Worth, we ran up some impressive long distance bills talking on the phone (this was before everyone and their dog had cell phones), e-mailed, and both made the 8-hour drive to visit a few times. By September, I was back in Jackson. I knew this relationship felt different, and I wanted to give it the best chance I could. Some people thought rearranging my life like that was a mistake, and even I had a hard time swallowing the idea that I was moving BACK to Mississippi, but my instincts (and God's leading) were right!

A year and a half later, on February 11, 2002, Adam proposed to me at that same park where we sat and talked after I graduated. And five months after that, on July 13, we were married in a beautiful ceremony in front our cherished family and friends. Our marriage isn’t always sunshine and rainbows and cute cuddly kittens (is anyone’s?), but we know that God brought us together and He will bless our union as long as we keep Him at the center. I thank God for my husband every day and I could go on and on about how great he is, but I’ve probably rambled enough for one blog post! If you’ve made it this far, I'll end by saying thanks for letting me share our "how we met" story!!!

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