Friday, February 26, 2010

Lucky

I had a post all lined up for today. It had the whole package - top ten list, self-deprecation, and a little inspiration, all rolled up into one for a funny Friday read. But when I sat down at my computer this morning and popped up one of my favorite blogs for a quick peek to start my day...my focus shifted.

I read a lot of blogs...less than I used to...but still, a lot. I tend to gravitate toward Tumblr, because the posts are short and I like to pop in for a little stress relief throughout my busy days. Blogs that are heavy on the reading suck me in, but I just don't have time for that business during the course of the work week. Georgie Girl is one of my favorites, for various reasons (you should see her adorable dog Winston). She's an Australian living in New York and she's currently pregnant with her first child. Here's the post that got my wheels turning:

It's not fair

A little break in my regular schedule of ‘happy’ posts:

Last night on my second trip to the bathroom I started crafting a blog post in my head to whinge about how awful the constant need to pee is. About two sentences in, I stopped. I remembered the stories that I have stumbled across this past week and realized I was the luckiest person in the entire world. I have no right to whinge about peeing three times a night. I have no right to whinge about ANYTHING.

The stories I read involved a woman my age giving birth to her daughter and realizing she has down’s syndrome, another woman’s baby dying in utero at 38 weeks due to a knotted umbilical cord, and the story of a 2 1/2 year old who will likely die very soon after a long battle with an aggressive form of cancer.

Every one of these stories had me in floods of tears. I was crying for the people behind the stories, I was crying at the unfairness of it all and I was crying from worry about my own unborn child (reading these stories as a 35 week pregnant woman was exceptionally difficult).

I’m struggling to understand why this stuff happens. I truly hate the phrase ’it’s not fair’ but you know what? It really isn’t fair.

I recently started reading two of the blogs that she is referencing in her post. The first is Enjoying the Small Things. The post about sweet Nella's birth is here, and I cannot recommend reading it enough. Though I will warn you, it had me weeping by the end. Another story she referenced was that of Layla Grace, a precious 2 year old girl who is fighting through the end stages of neuroblastoma after a sudden relapse. Frankly, that one is almost too heartbreaking to read. Another blog that I read is NieNie Dialogues, a blog written by Stephanie Nielson, a young mother of four who survived a horrible plane crash in 2008, but was burned over 80% of her body and is now managing a life of recovery balanced with being the normal mom of 4 little ones. She is nothing short of amazing. Beyond bloggers I've never met, there are so many people who I do know who have made it through things I cannot even fathom, and come out on the other side with such grace and such thankfulness for the little things in life.

I read these things and find that the perspective they give is so necessary. I am so unbelievably lucky to have normal, ordinary days full of work stress and conflict and challenge. We all battle trials and disappointments, and even the lesser ones do matter, but it's so vital to remember how blessed we are when we are not suffering through life's darkest moments.

I had lunch with sweet Staci this week, and she did something that just blew me away. She had a gift for me, well, for Max & Milo to be exact. When I pulled the tissue paper from the bag, I found the most beautiful quilt. All I could say was "No you didn't" over and over, so profound, right? You see, our talented Staci makes quilts as gifts for new babies, and this group of friends has had no shortage of new babies in recent years! With the two babies on the way, we're going on 8 now! I love each one of my friend-nieces and friend-nephews just as much as you can possibly imagine - they bring me such joy. And of course, this means lots of baby showers and excitement and gift giving, and I love every minute of it. But what my sweet friend thought about recently is that maybe that was something that was a little hard for me, not having children yet, and not knowing if they're on the horizon or not. And though it's not something I allow myself too much time to dwell on, she was right. Her gift just meant the world to me. It was such a reminder of how incredibly lucky I am to be so loved and cared about by such amazing friends. Even when my life feels lacking...it is so full.

I was reminded of that again reading Georgina's blog this morning. Life has so many really big heart-wrenching obstacles for so many people, and the little normal moments that pass unnoticed are really some of the most amazing things we have. Do your best not to miss those today...but go a little further than that...don't miss the opportunities to make a difference to someone who's dealing with the harder moments. I can't think of a more important opportunity in life than to touch the heart of someone who is hurting (however great or small), and lighten their load a bit, even if it's just for a moment.

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